Sunday, November 16, 2008

Halloween in the Hood

This was our first Halloween in the new neighborhood. We had a lot of kids, most of which came in minivans from other places. We even had a little kid steal one of our decorations on the front porch. Since Greg loves Halloween, we went all out in handing out candy. When we opened the door, we were fully dressed in our Star Wars costumes and had "The Imperial March" playing. It was great. One kid thought my mask blinded me and swiped a skull from our porch right in front of me. Jerk.
Intergalactic Family!

Friday, October 24, 2008

Gutter Slutters

We need gutters around the house. There is some wood rot forming. Not good. The process of remodeling our basement has shown us how much neighborhoods can change what should be a fair estimate. One of our plumbing estimates for the bathroom included MOVING the already set toilet... it reached $6,000. Whatever, dude.

There are gutter sluts out there; they only wish to extort money from you and you should hate them. We did some research and estimated our gutters would be about $500, including labor. One bid, a company who also can't take the hint and calls at least twice a day, put a $800 price tag on the project. When I finally found a company who didn't ask for my address first, their estimate was the closing bid, $400. The salesperson admitted that companies have prices for different neighborhoods.

Have you seen my street? Have you met my neighbors? I haven't met one who is particularly wealthy. It's madness. Remember this - gutter sluts. They are out there and they only wish to molest your budget.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Boo on Rock Port State Park, Hurray for Hyundais!

Greg and I needed some camping time away from the house. Okay, so it was mostly me who needed the time away. I was about to go insane with the endless projects in the basement. (Thank god the upstairs isn't a mess!) Being from central Washington, I associate camping with swimming. The Columbia river looks like a lake and there are endless camp sites that allow you to camp and swim. Not to mention Lake Chelan with it's glacier fed, crystal clear waters that are very refreshing on a hot summer day. YES - Washington state gets hot. NO - it doesn't rain a lot in central Washington. It's a desert.

Greg tried very hard to get us a camp site on a water source, so we packed up and headed to Rock Port. Not only did Greg pay $20 and not get his $10 change, but our site had become a parking lot for two huge vehicles. Death to Tahoes and diesel, white, extended vans!!! I know they are hard to park but placing them in another camp site = I hate them.

We drove back to get our refund, which wasn't really a refund with the incorrect change, and decided to bag the whole "let's camp on water" idea. As we made the drive to our usual campgrounds, Oak Hollow in Midway, we passed endless 350 trucks, Tahoes, and Escalates pulling boats, knowing they were headed to Rock Port. What made me get increasingly annoyed was that these vehicles were headed to an already FULL camp site and would do what the jerks had done at our site; they'd go to the boat launch, put the boat in the water, and the go park their extra vehicle at an empty camp site. Jerks - when a place is FULL this means those who reserved their site aren't there yet. God, I seriously hate those over consuming, pooping out babies, clogging the freeway, rude water breeders! I have never been around such a group.

Not once in my experiences in Washington at campgrounds on a water source, did I have my site taken as a parking lot, or heard people yell at ranger when the entrance line was taking too long. Perhaps it's the shortage of water camp sites here that brings out such frantic behavior. I've said this before, although not in a blog, "breeders" are a Utah thing. Selfish. Rude. I wish they'd sell their boats and extra large vehicles and travel the world or simply another state (Idaho excluded). They need to see how EVERYONE else lives. The worse part - they are breeding kids just like them. I'll never go back to Rock Port or Jordanelle. I hate the people who are there.

As for the Hyundai, now that it's our only vehicle, I love it's gas mileage. I love taking it camping with it's large trunk and room for the dog. Fantastic car. FAN-TAS-TIC.

Monday, July 7, 2008

Gun to my head

Kate tells me I have to make a post because it's starting to feel like the Kate Arch page and not the Arch Hogan page. Those of you that know me know that I am not really into the online communication scene that much. I use myspace and facebook as a means to an end to keep in touch with people. Of course this is limited to a message or so every six months. Regardless, I'm here and I may as well talk about something of importance: White trash idiot morons that are lazy.

I am referring to a select number of my neighbors. Specifically two houses north east of us and now the renting neighbors across the street. North house is all about the wife staying home drinking beer all day on the front porch talking to her friends on the phone at an extrememly loud volume. To make matters worse, her vocabulary is limited to someone that obviously didn't make it through high school. "Oh my god, did you hear what she said? I know. I know. Get out...." And to wrap up our trash neighbors to the north, the husband only knows one way to pick up his the collar.

Now to discuss our new renters. Divorced mother of two. And when I say two I mean one somewhat normal child and Forest Gump. She has taught her kids that everything you see belongs to us so don't worry about playing on everything. "Running out into the road? No worries. It's ok. Just don't come inside and interrupt me because I really need my semi hourly Meth fix. Anyone seen our dog in the last few days? I'm sure he'll be back."

Other then them our neighbor is full of nice, respectful, and quiet people. I'm sure as the neighborhood gets nicer and nicer we will hopefully weed these kind of idiots out. Apparently I need to wrap it up because now I'm being told I am writing too much....

The summer of X Files

This is our summer of watching the X Files box set Greg got me for my birthday. He really knows how to win my heart. I'm happy to say that Greg has been hooked on this show which makes him really want to believe that the truth is out there. As of now, we are midway through season six. This is my favorite season... and it also contains my favorite episode, "Arcadia." Good laughs, good scares, and good characters. Below is a series of clips from X Files episodes. All of you who want to believe, enjoy...

Here are some of the best scenes from, "Arcadia." I guess there are fans of this episode on youtube.

I'm trying to convince Greg that our first son should be named Fox.

It's the digital us

Meez 3D avatar avatars games
Greg is in pain from working on the basement. Ouch!
Meez 3D avatar avatars games

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Honestly people, this is cultish!

My buddy Alisa sent this over Myspace. I'm so shocked to know there is a website that is ripping desperate people off. More shocking is that there are people who are financially supporting the idea. Basically this website allows subscribers to leave a letter behind begging their non-born again Christian friends and families to convert after the rapture has taken place. Here is my argument condemning these turd-heads.

The Book of Revelations was written roughly 1,900 years ago, keeping in mind that the current measurement of time keeping wasn't solidified for the entire western world until the 19th century (cite, The Discoverers). Even with our current measurement, we suck at doing it right. Taking the flawed measurement of time keeping, and the natural passing of time, The Book of Revelations could have been written between the time span of 2,300 years to 1,800 years ago. Ancient texts of this time period are rarely (if ever) literal. This was a time when few could read and stories were memorized in lyrics. Often the stories evolved like the telephone game, increasing the drama and entertainment.

Finally, after The Book of Revelations had only been available in Greek and Latin, King James had it translated into English. So, here we are in the 16th century, finally getting the story in a more commonly literate, upper-class culture... just behind the Arabs whom had already created the first Romeo and Juliet tale which Shakespeare ripped off, but that's another story... The contents of The Book of Revelations had been through story teller after story teller, version after version, and settled upon in an English version now shared by millions. A few of them are now operating a website.

Why do they believe it is literally a sudden abduction of Christian believers? Why do these born-again Christians understand that the seven-headed beast as an analogy in the book, but choose to believe the others are literal? It makes absolutely no sense to me, and I find them annoying for believing in what had been commonly accepted and WRITTEN as an analogy so long ago.

The world is full of idiots. I simply must wait for the Earth to kill them off with disease.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

There is a god and he loves us!

We finally sold the Pathfinder! It was pure luck. Greg bought an 87 cent sign for Sporty and put it in front of the house on 1600 East. With in days, we had someone looking and placing an offer.

The luck went even deeper. Just when you think no one is buying an SUV, here comes a young family that lives up a hill whom needs 4 wheel drive in the winter. They have a Tahoe and it's, as the dad stated, "obnoxiously large and difficult." Sporty was just the size they were looking for!

It's been a rough time getting rid of the Pathfinder... part of me doesn't want to get rid of it. It was my first big purchase in life and there is such a sense of pride; "I bought that." Now that I live so close to work, have a bus line to school, TRAX line to school, and Greg's carpool meets by my school, it doesn't make sense to have a second car right now. Not to mention that gas prices!!! I think we've driven the Pathfinder twice since May. It just sits in the driveway, collecting heat rays.

I have a lot of memories with old Sporty... the time I went to SEATAC Airport and Dustin named it, "Betty Red Panties," or the time I blasted Ice Cube out the door and danced with friends at the Orchard Middle School parking lot. It's been on many road trips and it's been my shelter when I wanted to run away from crazy roommates.

Remember Boyz 2 Men? Yes, it is indeed hard to say goodbye to yesterday. Yet, it is easy to say goodbye to wasted gas money on a vehicle that serves no purpose other than memories.

Monday, June 23, 2008

Weddings are for what?

Somebody remind me because all I know is stress (invites, event insurance, boxed wine sales, incorrect ring sizes, dress alterations, zits, oreos, and a disappearing savings)...

No really, someone tell me what the hell is going on???

Sunday, June 8, 2008

Pride '08 Cash Cow

I'm sure Neil's blog will be ever-more entertaining regarding the same subject, Pride 2008, but I must share my utmost dismay.

Top Ten Reasons Pride 2008 SUCKED:

10. What was that bloody $10 entry fee?
9. What happened to the STREET dance? Who wants to dance on muddy, gross grass?
8. Since when did $5 buy you 3 ounces of wine?
7. When did it cost $50 to sit at a table in a PUBLIC park?
6. Do dirty, old pedophiles really think Greg is interested in them?
5. If bands volunteered their time to play, must we still pay the $10 to get in?
4. If you want people to pay for EVERYTHING, perhaps you should post where this money is going and not a simple, "To the Utah Pride Center."
3. Why must one pay the table fee to simply order the over-priced wine?
2. Is the Utah Aids Foundation having their Oscar party next year? (I'd prefer to attend that instead.)
1. Why were their so many strait couples there in prom attire?

Number one didn't necessarily suck, I just felt that Greg and I were under dressed having missed some mass email or announcement.

After going to Pride for so long in SLC, I'm disappointed in the cash cow it has become. Boo indeed and good bye Pride. I won't be attending next year.